How do I respond?

Do you remember that show, Kids say the darndest things?  Well they probably could have added a high school edition.  Over the last few days I’ve overheard some really interesting comments, or been asked things that seemed to come out of left field. 

For instance, my Spanish 1 kids are obsessed with knowing how old I am.  Every day there’s another question trying to get me to tell them my age (quite frankly I don’t care all that much if they know how old I am, but my mentor teacher is big on them knowing and respecting those questions you just don’t ask people older than you).  Two of them decided that I must be either eighteen years old and therefore way too young to be here, or thirty and trying to hide my age.  The latter comment was quickly followed by, “well, you can’t be thirty because you just look way too young, so you must be twenty or something.”  I finally told them I was a senior in college, and they didn’t believe me!  They are determined to get me to finally admit that I’m still a teenager regardless of how many times I’ve told them I’m older than that.  I’m pretty sure I’d have to show them my license for them to finally get it (although knowing them, they’d probably accuse me of having a fake ID).

They also want to know my first name.  Now that I’m okay with them not knowing that, because that’s just part of that really important line between the teacher and the students.  But one student has made it his mission to find out my first name.  I didn’t point out that my visitor’s sticker (which I don’t wear anymore so I supposed it doesn’t matter) had my full name on it, nor did he seem to notice.  I finally told him that once they all manage to remember and call me by my last name, maybe I’ll tell them my first.  Maybe being the operative word.

I’ve also been asked:

“How much are they paying you to do this?” 

“Are you a dancer for Disney?  You look like one.”

“How do you know Spanish if you’re not Hispanic?”

(to other teachers) “Does she speak English?”
                                    “Does she speak Spanish?”

“Wait, so why are you here again?”

“Do you have a boyfriend?”

“Do you speak English?  Say something!  I want to hear you speak in English!!”

“Why would you learn Spanish if you already know English?”

“Are you married?”

“Will you bring me food every day?  I won’t do anything if you don’t bring me food every day.”

“Are you going to be boring?”

“So…are you going to be here every day?”

I have a feeling the questions are going to get better (or worse, depending on how you look at it) as time goes by and the students get more comfortable with my being here.  At least I know they’re going to keep me on my toes.

In other news, a girl accidentally stabbed herself in the thumb with a staple today.  A staple, might I add, that had originally been attached to her quiz.  Funny, I thought that kind of stuff stopped after middle school…